What will they think?!

I’ve interviewed some really great authors and comedians and one of the
questions I always asked them was, “Do you worry what other’s will think?”
I asked this question because I am someone who always worries what others will
think. But, then again, there’s this dichotomy because half of me really worries to
the point of distress and the other half says, who gives a (fill in the blank).
It’s certainly never my intention to offend any one person. But, it is also certainly
my intention to make a point and tell a story. If by doing so, life gives me
inspiration for characters via family, friends, associates and what not – I sort of
feel really guilty not using them.

While I write based on experience (mine or others I know), I don’t create
characters that are exactly like someone I know. Once they are born in my mind,
they take on a life of their own and suddenly they are like 10 different people I
know all wrapped up into one deliciously neurotic human.

People who have read Lost and ProFound will ask me if I am Rebecca. Many parts of
Rebecca are just like me. She’s a mom, writer, neurotic and likes sex. But, those
who really know me, also see me as Wren, the super tidy woman who eats organic
foods. I’m a blend of all my characters and they are a blend of people I know and
plain old fashioned imagination. There’s those who relate to one or all of the
characters and then there’s getting comments like this, “I read your book and I
was taken aback by the vulgarities that came from the precious innocent Summer I
know.”

Eek! This happened over Thanksgiving and I immediately resorted to a school girl,
embarrassed by the fact that my dad knew I liked boys – like majorly crushed on
them. Was I no longer his innocent girl? Well, thankfully, I can be vulgar, sexy,
sweet, zany and messed up in the head and it really doesn’t affect my parents’
opinion of me either way. But, then there are some that are not my parents or best
friends that feed me other types of reactions to many things I do. Writing this
book, being one.

Well, coming from the source, I couldn’t expect anything else. But, because it’s
someone I really care for and love, I felt a twinge of guilt. Despite the fact that I’m
probably the most childlike and inexperienced of my friends and generation, to
this particular person, the fact that I could use doses of foul language and even
write about (shhhhh) SEX – was practically an invitation to my very own
intervention.

I felt like Kelly Lebrock in Weird Science, meeting Gary’s parents in reverse
suspenders, bright red lips and cleavage for days. And to the source of this
comment – I might as well be a porn star.I was then interrogated and examined under a
metaphorical microscope for how my mind could come up with such things. “Um, life?”

But, here’s what this temporarily unpleasant experience did for me: Sure, I was
afraid of what certain conservative extremes might think. I was concerned I might
offend them. I absolutely did worry. But, once the cat was out of the bag, it was
extremely liberating. I realized that while others may be ignorant to some parts of
life, I wasn’t and I never want to be. I’m fascinated and intrigued by the
differences in people and I love being aware and open and fearless about what
those differences might be. And maybe, in my mind, I’d like to visit and imagine
myself in those situations.

From this, I was now free to be me. My worst fears were over and I actually wasn’t
too shaken up about it. In fact, I was pretty stoked. Which is good, because I’ve
been working on my next book. And man, I can’t even imagine the response to this
one will be, but I’m so looking forward to it.