Two Weeks Till Christmas

Two Weeks Till Christmas

T’was two weeks before Christmas and all through the house,

Buddy, the Elf, was eating, drinking and getting soused.

Eating our cookies and drinking our rum.

Hey, at least I won’t worry about it going to my bum!

The kids made a tree and left snacks and toys with care

In the hopes that each morning, Buddy would be found somewhere.

And at night when they get all nestled into their beds

With visions of Buddy sending back good reports to his homestead,

I sit and ponder which ugly sweater to wear

And whether or not to curl my hair.

White elephant parties await our arrival,

Where gifting becomes some sort of rival.

My mind kept racing with thoughts that didn’t matter,

When out of the kitchen there arose such a clatter!

I sprang from my cozy bed in a flash.

On my way to the kitchen, I heard a big crash!

I looked up ahead and to my dismay,

Buddy and beanie boos doing the whip nae nae.

They knocked over a glass with their stanky leg move

And bop bop bopped like they had something to prove

“Watch me! Watch me!” Buddy started to yell

Doing the superman, until he finally fell.

I stood and watched; he didn’t see me at all.

I kept myself hidden just behind the wall

I didn’t have my phone and I needed social proof!

But the memory lives on of this crazy spoof.