Blended Families: Managing Unrealistic Expectations

Today’s episode is a crash course on the top assumptions people tend to make about their new blended family. It’s important to manage these unrealistic assumptions because the truth is, things probably won’t be fine and dandy from the get-go! And that’s ok.

Nothing in life comes easy. The relationship between you and your new step-child – or between new siblings – may not be exactly how you dreamed it would be before you moved in. Don’t stress. That’s normal. As with any relationship, it takes time to build trust and connection.

Today, Mike and I will talk about the process of gaining trust and respect within your new family dynamic. Listen in to hear some tips to get on the same page as your spouse, and learn how communication can get you that much closer to the blended family experience you first had in mind.

01:00 – 05:00 – Introducing today’s topic: Managing assumptions and expectations

05:00 – 09:30 – Expecting your new family and step-family to get along perfectly

09:30 – 13:00 – On earning trust and respect

13:00 – 20:00 – On step-kid behavior, empathy, and taking responsibility

20:00 – 29:00 – On the relationship between spouses and active communication

29:00 – 34:00 – Some final takeaways

Takeaways:

Blended families require time and effort to bond.
Know where you want to be and where you want to go.
Nothing in life is super-smooth sailing.
Set an intention, have a goal, and work towards it.
It might not be perfect right away or all the time. That’s normal.
Be genuine, empathetic and aware.
Let trust and respect be earned.
Be mindful of the fact that children process things like children.
You and your spouse won’t always see eye to eye.
Practice active communication.

Quotes:

“The things you care about most are the things you must struggle to achieve.” -Mike
“It doesn’t happen instantaneously. It takes time.” -Mike
“Trust is earned, respect is earned, and it is lost quickly.” -Mike

3 Interesting Clips:

08:32 – 08:50 – On being genuine.
11:37 – 11:52 – On expecting respect.
24:14 – 24:50 – On not expecting the other to understand fully.

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